姑娘把儿子从儿科病房带回来给我后,我便发现他的屁股有红肿与损伤,而且在儿子的婴儿透明箱的下层,摆放了一支药膏。
我看见儿子的屁股变成这样,心痛得无法言喻,同时亦感到一阵一阵的愤怒袭上心头,心痛的是我大概已估计到儿科病房的医护人员并没有按时替儿子更换尿片,以致排泄物长时间沾着屁股,造成红肿与损伤,而我愤怒的原因是竟然没有一位医护人员向我交代儿子屁股变成这样的原因,也没有人告诉我何时要替儿子涂药膏,药膏每天要涂多少次,就好像儿子完全没有发生任何事似的!
纵使我有多爱自己的儿子,但他身体所受的伤痛,是我没法替他去承受的,这使我的内心感到剧痛!
我知道向姑娘提出质询也是于事无补,而且我和儿子也不知要待在医院多久,于是只好平心静气地向姑娘询问药膏的用法,此事便如此了结。
「你知道我见到的时候有多心痛吗?」我在丈夫来探望的时候就儿子的情况对他发发牢骚,以抒发心中压抑着的感受。
「我知道,我也觉得心痛,但医疗系统长期人手不足,这个情况也是一直存在的,也是没有办法呢!」丈夫一边放下拿来给我的饼乾,一边安抚我说。
「我明白现实的情况,但我真的很心痛!儿子还未去儿科病房前,原本是好端端的,现在却变成这样!肯定是很痛的呢!」我望着正在睡觉的儿子,说着说着,我的眼眶不禁变得通好了。
丈夫赶紧把我抱入怀中,拍拍我的背脊,然后安慰道:「你不是说涂了药膏已经有好转了吗?他已经回来你身边了,有你这位妈妈悉心照顾,很快便会好起来了!没事的,不要哭了。」
我把头埋藏在丈夫的胸膛里,稍稍释怀,彷彿得到了一点安慰,一点力量。是的,当了母亲之后,总是时刻感到有点徬徨,有点乏力,但却不断告诉自己「我可以撑下去的!」只有这样,才能够在身体还未復原的情况下,靠着强大的意志尽最大的努力照顾儿子。因此,身边人的明瞭与安慰,便成为我精神上的动力,让我有勇气继续坚持这段刚开始不久,但过程将会非常漫长的育儿之路。
(待续)
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